Crushed by Hurricane Sandy

My teenage boys left me feeling alone in the dark when Sandy started to blow.

Article first published as Sandy Crushed Me on Technorati.

Federal officials estimate that 45,000 families are homeless because of Hurricane Sandy.  That’s a crushing blow, and I hope that you, like me, are putting your money where your heart is by donating supplies.

Sandy didn’t take my home (Thank Goodness!) she only took my electricity for 10 days.  Not nearly as crushing, but Sandy crushed me all the same.  It wasn’t the power outage—that was just inconvenient.

Sandy crushed the image I had of my family.

Happy Family Preparing Together

Days before the storm, the media prepared us for potential disaster.  With my traditionally positive framework, my teenage sons and I got ready for a “camping adventure”  should the lights go out.  Knowing that my husband would be away, I invited my sons to play a bigger role—be more leaders than followers.  While the lights were on and life was easy, they were all in favor leading me to believe that we were standing side-by-side.  What a crushing blow to be left feeling alone in the dark when Sandy started to blow.

The Cold Reality

I wanted to believe that my efforts over the past 8 years had helped to create empathetic and generous young men.  Yes, my boys are empathetic and generous, I just thought they were much farther along.  I thought that they would be able to set aside personal desires and support the family … no, not the family—me.  I wanted to believe that they could and would recognize my hour of need as a greater priority than gaming and social media.  They couldn’t and I was crushed.

The Drawing Board

With electricity restored, I’m staring at a familiar semi-clean slate;  this is how it all started for us 8 years ago.  Back then we came together creating two great solutions:  the Morning Peacemaker Method, and Peacemaker Parenting.  It time for an update.

Fraud Factor? Nah

I hesitated to share this story with you because I worried that you might not like me or accept my ideas if you knew that I was having problems.  I realize, though, that it’s through sharing my problems, and my experiments for solutions, that I am of value.  My dream is to create a generation of people who can think for themselves and have the courage to do something about it.

People stumble all the time, but leaders have the courage to face challenges and find solutions.  Peacemaker parents need to be courageous leaders and so my dream requires me to share the good, the bad, and the ugly.

The Challenge

There had been indications that my family solutions needed an update.  I tried to avoid it by talking—talking way too much—about what I wanted to see.  It took Sandy to silence my voice creating the room for truth.  The challenge will be finding inspiring ways to encourage my boys to also consider an update. That takes appreciating the present environment as we compare it to what we all really want.   It’ll be interesting and I’ll keep you posted.

In the meantime, please share what you can to help the families crushed by Hurricane Sandy.  Share your stories and donate your time and money.  We always play better when we play together.

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Author: Lorraine Esposito

Lorraine Esposito Lorraine@Peacemaker-Coach.com 914-410-7502 Lorraine Esposito is a certified professional life coach, mentor coach, owner of The Center for Coaching Mastery at Westchester Community College in New York, and nationally recognized author of The Peacemaker Parent, Solving Problems for Today, Teaching Independence for a Lifetime, Lorraine is the featured life coach for a popular New York radio station, WFAS 103.9 FM and is in collaboration with and featured blogger for the National Football League and USA Football adding a ‘coach approach’ to coaching youth sports. Lorraine’s client base includes CEO’s in the entertainment industry, White House and Capitol Hill public affairs staff, entrepreneurs, global TED speakers, award winning writers, new coaches just starting out, successful business women between 40 and 55 looking for more out of life, and parents needing a little help making good on their parenting promises. Lorraine’s career matches the diversity in her coaching practices. Starting out in the rural mid-west, Lorraine has owned four small businesses; the first, an automobile repair center, started at age 16. Her corporate experience is mainly in negotiating multimillion dollar contracts as the buyer of domestic in-flight food and beverages for Trans World Airlines and then as a procurement manager for the New York City Transit Authority. Lorraine’s strength has always been creatively finding solutions to even the most complicated goal. In addition, Lorraine’s 30 years as a professional fitness coach continues to add depth to all her endeavors. She has been featured in various print, broadcast, and on-line media and is a public speaker regarding personal leadership to community and school-based audiences. Lorraine lives in New York with her husband and two teenage sons.

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